Lemonade

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Lemonade. Making Lemonade out of Lemons.

Inspiring documentary about people who found their true passion after getting laid off at work.

I’ve reach a point where I feel I’m almost burned out from my professional work. This is not my first burnout, and is just one of the multiple ones throughout the phase of my life in computers.

I started to freelance in early 2009 after my partners and I winded down FRRO LLP, a webhosting company we started 2 years eariler to cover the then non-existent budget virtual private servers industry in Singapore.

We had fun, we played well, but being the overachiever, I tend to burn myself out pretty fast. As we started to get more and more clients working from our homes, we started to feel really good about ourselves. I started to work even harder, pushing myself even more and blaming myself for any of our setbacks. I worked through nights writing technical documents, keying in our accounts, responding to e-mails and thinking about new marketing opportunities. I did these for a few months straight and finally one day, I felt really lousy.

I fell into a rut. I felt really lousy when I couldn’t get the 101th client after trying for days. I got more and more tired about what I’m doing as our business plateau-ed. I started to question what am I doing, whether this is the right job for me and whether there’s any future in it. Deep down inside, I loved what I was doing and I loved working with my partners. I loved IT with a passion, but I just burned out…

We winded the company down months later and took a break before starting to pick myself up again and do something new. I went into web development freelancing. Little did I know, my personal challenges to myself to keep pushing myself to achieve more has led me to the same path. While still doing my freelance on my side, I’ve settled down to become co-founder for a startup doing an online collaborative search platform.

I kept keeping myself busy because I want to challenge myself and I’m starting to feel the stress of doing too much things at one time. I found myself dragging myself to work everyday, having to juggle both the administrative side of running a startup as well as leading the development team in the daytime and working on my freelance projects on the night time. I started to ask myself if I’ve traded the liberty of working anywhere anytime for the safety and comfort of a desk and whether it was worth it.

(People who know me, know me as someone who refuses to be bounded. I enjoy the freedom of being self-employed as a freelancer as I’m able to choose my clients and work anywhere anytime).

I recognize this form of self-question. I was burning out and burning out fast.

I decided to take a break today from work, to try and catch my breath and hopefully relight the passion. I don’t know how long I can continue to do what I’m doing now with my startup and freelancing, but I’m glad I found this short film today to tell me that I need to slow down and start thinking about which direction I’d like to take with my life.

To all you fellow freelancers and entrepreneurs out there, I hope this film finds you well and helps to keep you going just as you’re starting to feel like you’re about to hit a dark dark road.